Uke and Seme
by Masaki-Hanabusa
Summary: There is a website that determines which one you are and what type of seme or uke you are. I force Ash, Gary, James, and Paul to take the quiz.


A/N: I was bored. I was reading a comment from Yuki-neechan about if Ash and James took the semeuke quiz, so I decide, what the hell. I took the quiz.I got my result. Then I tried my best to do the quiz as Pokemon characters. If you are really bored and want to read this, then I hope you enjoy this. If you are now heading to the back button cause you want a real story, then go ahead because I completely understand.

* * *

Ash: Hey Masaki! What're you up to? (peers over Masaki's shoulder)

Masaki: Do you EVER knock?

Ash: Sorry. I'll remember that for next time. ^^

Masaki: Suuuuure. Anyway, I'm taking a quiz. (points to computer screen)

Ash: (Not sure what to think when he see its a seme or uke quiz) Um...

Masaki: Hey, how bout after I finish, you take the quiz? (hopeful)

Ash: I'm not really a quiz-

Masaki: Good! I knew you would do it!

Ash:...

Masaki: Yay! The final question! (Clicks submit to your fate button)

Ash: What did you get?

Masaki: It says...Chibi seme! 'Mischievous, loyal, and intelligent, the Chibi Seme always seems to have a quiet energy whispering around them, suggesting that there is much more to them then what there first appears to be. Laid-back, and not one to call a lot of attention to themselves, they tend to guard their creative, forceful, (and somewhat manipulative) inner self behind an easygoing and playful exterior shell, which makes it impossible for most to truly know them. It takes a special Uke personality to see into the Chibi Seme's deep hidden self and release their sensual side, but once the Chibi Seme has let in that one special person, they will be forever loyal, loving, and protective.'

Ash: Wow.

Masaki: That's eerily...right... This is creepy... OKAY! YOUR TURN! (Shoves him into the chair)

Ash: But I don't want to!

Masaki: Don't try to fight! It say I am somewhat manipulative so no matter what you do, one way I'll get you to take it. So wouldn't you prefer to do this the nonviolent way?

Ash: ...Fine. (Starts clicking on the answers then pauses)

Masaki: What's wrong?

Ash: I don't know how to answer this one.

Masaki: Have you ever tied someone up? Have you?

Ash: No, but I've been tied up plenty of times. But I think the situation is a bit different...

Masaki: I think the 'I'm always the one getting tortured *sob*'is the best answer.

Ash: I think I agree. The other answers are not exactly the best answers for me. (keeps clicking) Sad, I'm not old enough to drive, so...

Masaki: I love that answer! Bicycle for vehicle!

Ash: Why?

Masaki: Because you're a bicycle murderer! (He is)

Ash: Ideal pet? My partner... well I don't really think Pikachu is my pet.

Masaki: I don't think that's what it's talking about.

Ash: And the final question... (blinks and blushes as he reads the question)

Masaki: Well now we know the answer (laughing hysterically)

Ash: (clicks submit button) I'm scared

Masaki: Yay! Results! 'You are the innocent uke. Cute and sweet, and most gentle of all uke, whips and chains are not for you - you just want someone to love you. You are often spotted in candy shops wearing furry kitty ears, where you are sure to be noticed by the Romantic Seme, whose protective instincts will kick in and will only want to take you home and love and protect you. And you, of course, will be more than happy to spend the rest of your life baking cookies for your seme.'

Ash: When the hell did I ever go into candy shops with kitty ears?

Masaki: Don't deny you want to! (Evil grin) I knew you were uke!

Gary: Who's uke?

Ash and Masaki: (yells in surprise to see Gary, Paul, and James behind them)

Masaki: Why do you people never knock? Or call before coming over.

Gary: Sorry but I don't have your number.

Masaki: What are you three doing here anyway?

Paul: None of your damn business.

James: We were bored. Now what's this about an uke? (curious)

Masaki: (points at Ash with a grin) Ash is an innocent uke! (everyone except Ash is resisting the urge to laugh)

Ash: Hey! Shut up! Why don't you take it then! (offers Gary the chair)

Gary: Maybe I will. (starts quiz. At the third question, he pauses) I'm not sure how to answer this.

Ash: Join the club.

Gary: (continues quiz) Um... what the hell is with the ideal job question?

Paul: What? I thought you already worked as a stalker. (gary is resisting the urge to kill Paul)

Ash: That... is true. You were always where I was.

Masaki: Hey! You were too Paul. And James! You are all stalkers

Gary, Paul: Shut Up!

James: Oddly it is kinda true.

Gary: (clicks submit button) Okay... lets see. Opportunist Seme. 'Clever and charming, the Opportunist Seme knows just how to move in and capture the attention of a potential partner. Manipulative and somewhat selfish, this Seme isn't beyond stirring up a little mischief or confusion to get what they want. Luckily for those who don't catch on to their schemes, this Seme personality isn't into a lot of drama or hurt feelings, so their trickery is usually balanced out by the gift of their charismatic presence. And although they tend to have devious and somewhat materialistic ways - and you never really know just what they are plotting next - it's really all in good fun, as once they find the right person, they actually make very kind and caring partners.'

James: Oh! Look there! It says Innocent uke and Opportunist Seme are somewhat compatible and good learning experiences.

Paul: (snickering)

Masaki: And so Palletshipping grows a little bit stronger.

Gary: Hey! At least I'm not uke like him! (points to an annoyed Ash) Paul, get your ass in the chair.

Paul: Why the hell should I? I didn't come here to take retarded gay quizzes.

Masaki: Because if you don't, I'll write a yaoi fanfiction were you are the uke! (Whips out pencil with an devious grin)

Paul: ...Shit. Fine I'll do it. But make fun of the results and I'll punch your lights out.

Everyone:...Jerk.

Gary: (watching pauls answers) You don't dye your hair?

Paul: No.

James:Nope.

Masaki: Ah, the power of anime. Where no hair color is unnatural.

Ash: Alcohol? A mean to get what you want!

Gary: Damn. You really are a bastard.

Paul: Will you just shut the hell up so I can get this over with?

Everyone: (looking at the answers Paul put in) There is no denying you are a bastard.

Paul: I SAID SHUT UP (Clicks submit button then gets up)

James: Where are you going?

Paul: This is stupid. I'm leaving. (slams door loud)

Masaki: Purple haired jerk.

Gary: So what did he get.

Ash: Um... Don't fuck with me seme...' Possibly the most easily misunderstood Seme personality - the dark intense eyes of the DFWM Seme silently penetrating deep into your true motives is enough to frighten most away. Only those with a taste for playing with danger, and a craving for sensual punishment, would approach willingly into this fire. Intensely possessive and serious, this Seme is driven by challenge - and the thrill of the hunt, capture, and physical dominance over their partner in their shared game of power and submission. And despite this Seme being silent (unless provoked into anger) and more of a loner, once they've found the right partner - someone who can match their intensity and darkness - they are deeply protective, loyal, and sensual. '

Masaki: I think we all guessed that one (everyone nods in agreement).

Gary: Is it just me or is the guy that's supposed to be the don't fuck with me seme look like an angry Edward Cullen?

Masaki:Huh? Yeah it does. Well all that's left is James.

James: Alrighty! (takes a seat and gets started)

Masaki: (Not paying attention much as James does the quiz) Soo... who wants to buy me a pizza?

Gary: Can't you order your own?

Masaki: I could, but then that wouldn't be fun?

Ash: (only one paying attention to the quiz) You'd go as a vampire?

James: Yup! I'd look cool!

Ash: As a female vampire? (Masaki is trying to steal Gary's wallet in the background)

James: Why do you think I'd go as a female vampire?

Masaki: (drawn to the conversation) Because you are ALWAYS crossdressing! I have nothing against it, but still. You do it all the time.

James: I do? I never really noticed. (hand Masaki $20) Here. For the pizza.

Masaki: Thank you! (hugs the life out of him)

Ash: Hey the last question!

James: Okay. (clicks submit) Now lets see the result! (eager)

Gary: 'Romantic seme. Intelligent and honest, the Romantic Seme has refined but modest tastes - whether it's food, art, or their own wardrobe. Their appearance can sometimes give the impression of being somewhat unapproachable, when actually, the Romantic Seme cares little for materialistic things, and only wants to shower their partner with their love and protection. Romantic Seme also tend to be very giving to those they are close to, and need to be careful not to be too giving... sacrificing much of themselves to insure the happiness of others.'

Masaki: That sounds about right. (Dialing Dominos)

Ash: Except for the intelligent part.

James: Shut up twerp.

Gary: Mwahahaha!

James: What's with you?

Gary: Look! Ashy-boy is someone uke again!

James and Ash: WHAT? 'The Innocent Uke's sweet nature would bring out some of the best qualities in the Romantic Seme. The loving, protective side of the Romantic Seme would complement the Innocence of their partner, and make this a wonderful relationship.' Gross!

Masaki: Oh I am soooo loving this! (resisting fangirl squeals) Oh yes can I get-

Gary: So in short, Ash, you our uke. (evil grin)

Ash: Uh Gary? (Yelps as Gary cups Ash's cheek and gets close. Real close)

Gary: What is it my little uke? (seductive voice)

Ash: (blushing badly) I-I uh... I... um (Gary busting up laughing, while Masaki whips out video camera)

James: Now, now twerp, that is not how one treats such an innocent uke. (Grabs Ash by the waist and hand him a rose) A token of my love. (Ash turns even redder)

Masaki: (still filming) Kyah!

Ash: Th-thanks, I uh...(doorbell)

Masaki: Damn! The pizza came too quickly!

James: We'll get it. (He and Gary leave. As soon as the door closes, they start busting up laughing. Ash's blushy face was priceless)

Masaki: Wow. The things quizzes will cause. That was, like, a portion of my fangirl fantasy.

Ash: (still recovering) Mine too.

A/N: Yeah. I was mucho bored. These are the actual results I got for them. Some of those questions are really hard when you are trying to be somebody else.

Sadness. Chibi Semes are not compatible with Innocent ukes. They are just amigos. But at least both James and Gary were! XD. Paul is compatible not.

I also did Drew and Barry, but the thing was going on too long so I excluded them. Drew also got Romantic seme. When I was doing the server brings the wrong food question for Barry, I was yelling out, "Where's the 'I'll fine them' choice!" I was expecting Barry to be the uke, and he was the flamboyant uke. He kind of reminds me of another flamboyant uke (Shuichi Shindou from Gravitation). Well anyway, I got bored. If you are still reading this, then you are awesome and deserve this hug! o(^u^o) Thanks for reading! Reviews are welcome.

Paul: Idiot.

Masaki: I thought you left?

Paul: I heard you had pizza. So give me some.

Masaki: Go home Paul!


End file.
